Now listen, I could make some big resolution to blog everyday in January, but let’s all face the fact that I’ve already missed the first day, so that resolution is screwed. I almost got out of bed last night to post something, just so I could make that my resolution and then I said, “aw f#(% it. I’m tired.” Which, I suspect, is how many people handle New Year’s resolutions.
Ok, now here’s the real deal on my resolutions. Or resolution. They are still not fully formed, except this one. Forgiveness.
This craziness all started when I read the book, “The Shack”. Many people I know have read the book. They’ve told me how wonderful they found it to be-“life-changing”, “thought-provoking”-all those hyphenated praises that people give to books. I resisted. I’m still in an I don’t know what I believe kind of place, so I didn’t want some crazy book about a guy in a shack talking to God to scramble my brain any further. I resisted and resisted and resisted. Dug in my heels. Scoffed. Shook my head at the book when I would pass it in the store. That shake of the head that says, “you silly, silly, overly religious, altar-callin’, holy-rollin’, hellfirin’ and brimstonin’, misguided little book. I am much too jaded and worldly to get anything from you.” Until a friend whose judgement I trust, who is in much the same place as I am religion-wise, asked me if I wanted to read it. She told me that she went into the book fully expecting to hate it, and then didn’t. So I read it.
And I didn’t hate it. I did not hate it. To be fair to the book, I found it to be none of the things I had thought it would be. Other than a tad overly descriptive. But when you’re trying to describe heaven and God, I guess it’s natural to get a little out there with the descriptions. And to quote King Julian, “After much deep and profound brain things inside my head”, it made me realize that I need to forgive some folks.
Forgiveness, according to The Shack, is taking your hands from around the throat of another. I love that analogy. Think of the effort it takes to keep your hands around all the throats of all the people who may have wronged you. And seriously, who has that many arms? I’m not one of those great Hindu gods with all the arms. Just have two. What will I do with all the extra energy I have now that I’m not wasting it on strangling folks? The possibilities are staggering!
And before any of you in the peanut gallery pipe up, I am painfully aware that I need forgiveness too, but I’m not in charge of that part of the equation. I can only be in control of where my hands are, not where other people’s are. Although, to carry the analogy further, being forgiven is very much like being able to take a deep breath again. I have been blessed to know that feeling.
There are many more thinks, yes thinks, that go into this. Does it matter if the forgivee knows you’ve forgiven them? Does it matter that the forgivee doesn’t think they need to be forgiven? I guess the answer to those questions would be no, it only matters on the forgiver’s end. The act of forgiveness is what sets one free to then live and love unconditionally. “Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass againt us.” We forgive because we are forgiven. As we forgive, we are forgiven. Ooo, the churchy part of me is still there somewhere!
So, there you have it. Not a particularly funny post, but those will come soon enough. 2010 can’t be all about the serious, can it? If it is, I want out right now, just sayin’.
Happy 2010! May we all find what we are looking for this year.